general Proving once again that I can do anything faster than everyone else…

Posted June 25, 2005 • Comments Off on Proving once again that I can do anything faster than everyone else…

…I lost one of my lenses this morning. Less than twelve hours after receiving them.

What’s weird is, I don’t remember losing it. I remember failing to put it in my eye four thousand times then not having it. I thought it was in, because I’m still not sure about when they’re in (I’ve only done this twice now, you see). So I gave myself all these vision tests (well, down the hall, can you read that? No, but can I read that with my glasses? I don’t know.) and established that it probably wasn’t in my eye. I put the other one in, to compare, and spent a long time staring at my eyes and seeing if I could see the edge of the lens. I decided I could see the edge of the lens in my left eye, but not my right, so the right lens must not have gone in. So I opened another one and put that in. First try, mind you. Little bastards.

But the whole day—and when I say “the whole day” here, I mean “from 10 am to midnight, when I got home from fucking work”—THE WHOLE DAY—I remained convinced that there were two lenses in my right eye, and that the one I’d lost had worked its way around back and was embedded in my brain.

I just took them out (two of them, not three) and decided there is not, in fact, another lens in my right eye. BUT I CAN’T BE SURE.