general Here’s what I hate about this.

Posted October 26, 2005 • Comments Off on Here’s what I hate about this.

Money is ALL I think about. Every single day. Where it’s coming from, where it’s going, what I can sell to get enough that I won’t be homeless come the 6th of the next month.

Everything I do that’s fun isn’t fun because it reminds me I should be somewhere trying to earn money. Every time I sleep late I’m wracked with guilt that I’m not working. Every time the phone rings I think it’s a job, and I take them all, I never say no, but it’s never enough.

And finally I get what looks like a chance to be okay again, not to live this guilt-ridden half-life, and I fucking blow it.